A Little Q&A

What kind of special needs does Jonathon have?

Jonathon had an infection in his skull that produced a cyst filled with 2 cups of pus. It was misdiagnosed and went untreated, forcing his the left lobe of his brain into the right side. After surgery he’s improved quickly. He is now 2 1/2 years old, eating liquids though a bottle, saying a few words, learning to walk and developing the ability to bond with a family. Current images of his brain show that it’s nearly normal, but it’s unknown how the previous brain trauma will affect his development.

Why was Jonathon abandoned?

Perhaps when the doctors told his family that Jonathon’s condition was terminal, they felt unable to cope with a dying child. This scenario is not uncommon in China.

Is Jonathon doing well?

Mostly, yes. He has been happy, involved, affectionate, eating, playing and sleeping normally. He still has many things to learn such as emotionally bonding to parents. A major concern is his aversion to eating.

How are Titus & Michael adapting to having a new brother?

Titus and Michael are relational and adaptable, so they felt comfortable when Jonathon joined the family.

What is the welfare center and what is the Butterfly Home?

The welfare center is an enormous Chinese state-run facility including orphanage and residences for elderly and disabled. The Butterfly Home is foreign-run children’s hospice located within the welfare center. They generally accept children with a life expectancy of 6 months or less.

Does the welfare center give you money?

The Chinese government allocates 800 RMB ($125 USD) monthly for each orphan. The arrangements aren’t clear and we aren't expecting any money. However, the Butterfly Home has kindly given us some of their Pediasure formula, which is Jonathon’s greatest expense.

Are you responsible for his medical costs?

We’ll take care of minor things. But if, for example, he needed another surgery this would not be our responsibility since he still 'belongs to the State'. As with all Butterfly Home kids, Jonathon’s past surgeries have been sponsored by donors who want to help disadvantaged children who have no family.

Why did you want to foster Jonathon?

After helping in the welfare center for a couple years, seeing several hundred orphans convicted us to do something – even if we can only help one.

How long is Jonathon staying with you?

Until he is adopted.

Why don’t you adopt him?

Chinese law states that adoptive parents must be 30 years old. We are 26 and 25.

When will he be adopted?

Perhaps in one or two years.

How does this affect your plans to visit the US?

Since Jonathon cannot leave the country, we are planning to stay here with him until he’s adopted.

What’s the benefit of Jonathon being in your home, rather than remaining in the Butterfly House, especially since he will transition to another family in the future?

A good family is always better than an orphanage, even if it is transitional. In our home he has an opportunity to bond with Daddy & Mommy, and is challenged to develop alongside healthy siblings.
Furthermore, taking Jonathon out of the Butterfly Home opened a crib allowing them to accept another 'terminally ill' boy named Finlay from the welfare center; now he may have a chance to live.


Please drop any other questions you may have in the 'reader response' box below or contact us: drew.addington@gmail.com.


family:
家 
jiā

A Factory Worker's Memoir

On Thursday Drew's class visited a local industrial park, including several factories. 

Guess what mystery food the workers are packaging!

oh just dried fruit

oh just... preserved chicken feet

Drew's photos of the factory reminded me of two things. 


#1
My friend D.L. who is the same age as me, and has a son the same age as Titus. I met her while she and her sister were working seven days a week in her aunt's bakery adjacent to our former apartment. Both chose not to finish high school (what's the point) so they could earn money. D.L's son is back in their hometown with grandma, D.L.'s hubby is working in a southern city.


Anyway, this summer D.L. quit the bakery, leaving her little sis, and took a factory job in Guangzhou. The night-shift pay is a little better, and the night life is way better, but she'll see her son even less. Sadly, there are many migrant worker moms like D.L. It always breaks my heart, causes me to admire their ability to 'eat bitterness' and make sacrifices for their families, and reminds me stop complaining and be thankful.

my pal D.L.

#2
Reminds me of my of my own factory experience! 
I shall call it ---- A Factory Worker's Memoir


My second year of college I had a five-week Christmas break, so I spent five weeks working the night shift on an assembly line. We made tiny tin-foil-like parts for computers. We were in a very bright clean room, everybody in white smocks, hairnets, gloves, face masks. Everything was white. There was even white noise. We were all robots, completing the same 1:23 second process for a lovely 12-hour shift. The only thing that made it bearable for me was the knowledge that this was just five weeks. And...the beautiful people!!! The cynical ex-trucker, the goofy-immature single dad, the rough but nurturing granny who'd had at least four husbands, the too-cool latino guy, the nervous Somali, the gentle-reflective Somali, and the wacky-happy Somali. And me the college girl. A hilarious mix!!!


Actually, since I particularly love Muslims, the Somalis became my friends and came over to my parent's house for chicken soup once. Then I went back to Georgia for college. The wacky-happy Somali called me sometimes and always told me "One day, I'm SURE, you'll become a Muslim." hehe. Drew and I invited those guys to our wedding, but they didn't show. 

While searching for that pic with the Somali guys I also came across these. Somewhere in that five week Christmas break I took Drew skiing. It was his first time. He was not good.

endure hardship:
吃苦 
chī kǔ
But this literally means to eat bitterness, something for which Chinese have an extraordinary ability.

River & Cheese

 

Last Sunday night we swung down to our 湘江 Xiang Jiang River. Picked up a pizza. What? Yeah, there's a hole-in-the-wall pizza place by our house now. We like never buy pizza cuz it's about 5x the cost of a normal meal. But this hole-in-the-wall pizza joint is less than half the price of Pizza Hut, and tastes pretty wow. I think our pizza intake is about to spike from 2x/year to 4x/year. Life is so ironic! I ate pizza 4x/week when I was in high school.

After the pizza Drew and the boys shot carnival airsoft guns at balloons, no win on the jumbo stuffed animals. By the way did you know that there are zero civilian firearms in China? (At least, in theory. There was a shooting murder a couple miles north of our house last spring.)

Got somethin' new up my sleeve for Chinese Neighbors. You know I love Chinese language, and I'm sure you love it too, right!? You could say it's the coolest language in the world, with the largest number of speakers and gaining ground as an international business language. Plus it's ancient, artistic, difficult, and fascinating with layers upon layers of meaning. But the best thing about progressing in Chinese is that this language allows me to know the great folks who surround me. So anyway, every post here on out is going to have a new Chinese character for you. 

In celebration of our new pizza place, our word is...

cheese:

奶酪 

nǎi lào

nǎi = milk

lào = something like 'jelly' or 'paste'

So cheese is milk jelly paste, mmm, mmm.

Have a great weekend everyone! Enjoy some 奶酪 on a pizza if you can!

Miss You Friends

Dear Pals in America,


First, we miss you all. It's sad thinking about how little we actually get to see you.


Second, I don't think you realize how much we appreciate you. So many of you have helped us. Sincerely -- it's overwhelming to think about how much kindness has been extended to our family. Thank you for every email, letter, prayer, every encouraging word and every form of help. We have unusual friends. And by that I don't mean you're weird, I mean folks of unusually great integrity, faithfulness and goodwill.


Glad we can walk through life together. We'd be sunk without you! Just love you all and miss your company.


Drew & Rachel

Bad Chemistry

The chemistry building burned yesterday after lunch. Drew called from near the library and told me to look outside. This is the scene from our kitchen widow, where I could hear the roar and crackling of the fire, and spy aggressive red flames flashing above the tree tops. 

In Common

What do all these people have in common? (not including me & Drew) Don't be afraid to venture a guess if you want to. There's actually several things they all have in common.

• abandoned because of disability and expected to die
• grew up in an orphanage (not a nice place)
• society said "you're useless because you've got nothing to contribute"
• somebody gave them a chance and afforded them human dignity
• we are lucky enough to be their good friends (or in Jon's case, his parents)

Lest you think I'm always happy, tonight I am deeply hurt and crying. We all hurt sometimes...or often. And I miss my family, 'specially my Dad when I'm sad.

(Kissing)x4 = Sore Lips

 辛苦中有幸福 

happiness in the midst of difficulty

At the end of the day my wrists ache from holding chunky babies. I even noticed that my lips are sore from (kissing + kissing + kissing) x4 guys. 

sore wrists and lips = difficulty (however tinsy-winsy)

chunky babies and excessive kissing = happiness

 

Be prepared to split a rib over this hilarious child Michael!

Pre-Jonathon, lots of neighbors guessed that Titus and Michael were twins at first glance. It's just cuz Chinese people don't have a schema for two sons so close in age...an unimaginable combination with China's population control laws. The only possibility is twins.

Now when I'm out with the boys, everyone is guessing that Jon and Mike are twins, which I find absolutely tickling. They assume that Mike looks like me and Jon looks like my Chinese husband. Hehehe. Now if Drew is with us I'm not sure what people are postulating...but we sure get lots of puzzled looks and "Huh? But that one looks a little bit like a Chinese kid?" "Are all three yours?" My answer is Yep, they're all mine. I gave birth to those two. This one is my son too.

They're all mine. 

Hence the sore lips.

Postal Mail Address

ANDREW ADDINGTON
CENTRAL SOUTH UNIVERSITY
932 LUSHAN RD S

CHANGSHA, HUNAN 410083

PEOPLE’S REPUBLIC OF CHINA

410083中国湖南省长沙市

岳麓区麓山南路932号

中南大学校本部 高家坪9栋607房

艾思远 电话15211133187

Tips for mailing stuff:

• letters and packages require 2-4 weeks
• print this label and adhere to envelope or package; inclusion of the Chinese characters is essential! (if the characters are not appearing for you in the above address -- email me and I'll send you a pdf)
• inform us if you send something so we can watch for it
• rest assured... at our present address we've had no trouble with packages being lost

It was a considerable amount of trouble trying to figure out our postal mail address. We ended up subscribing to a local daily paper just so we could get a legitimate mail box. But the plastic thing busted, so the postman puts letters on our double stroller parked on ground floor. When packages arrive we get a phone call and must be present to sign for them.

Our first year (especially Christmas) in China, we were hoping for packages. Now we've weaned ourselves off chocolate and cheese! haha! Please don't misuderstand: we have been floored, totally grateful for packages sent. But postage is outrageous, so go ahead and use that 50 bucks for any cause greater than shipping...if you like. If you really want to send a package, ok! ok! We still hugely appreciate it and get all bouncy-happy ripping into the box.

Letters are cheap and we always relish getting a real note from a friend. Just tell us what's going on in your life.

Hey and here's where we live!