Mono

I was thinking of titling this post Mano Y Mano, Spanish for "hand to hand" and meaning something like a little spar between foes -- but I was afraid that you might not catch the nuance -- Drew versus Mono, as in, mononucleosis, as in, Drew has mono. But he's home now! After four days and three nights in the hospital, and silly trouble figuring out what could have been a simple diagnosis.

As told by the infirm himself:

After going to the hospital several times last week (and suggesting that I had Mono—they disagreed).  My throat was so swollen it was hard to eat and drink and because they didn’t really know what the sickness was, I was admitted into the hospital (last Sat).  They did a bunch of tests but apparently did not have the capability to test for Mono or strep throat.  Finally on Monday, they diagnosed me with Mono based on my symptoms (Fever, sweats, tonsillitis, enlarged spleen, slightly abnormal liver function, swollen glands on neck and from the blood report).  After this diagnosis I suggested the medicine that a Western physician had recommended and they thought it was a bad idea, but instead said I needed to stay for at least another week and continue with the ivs (I got about 13 different bottles a day) and maybe a biopsy of one of my swollen glands. At that point I had a loss of confidence that they knew what they were doing and I left.

EVERYONE is carrying mono. In developing countries almost everyone gets the mono virus as a kid, but it manifests only as a cold or flu. The person will carry this virus for life, and it can become active and contagious at times, but the person will never experience symptoms. So probably every Chinese person is walking about with the virus, and since Drew was first exposed as an adult, he gets the symptoms that we are familiar with in America. 

Titus & Michael both had mild fevers last week, so they're probably carrying the virus now too, and Jonathon certainly has picked it up after living in an orphanage. As for me...this is the kissing disease...therefore I should be sick...but I'm not... ???

Patient's family provides the care. Although Drew was admitted to the best hospital in Hunan province, the patient's family is still responsible for some of his care, like water, food, clothing, toiletries, and acquiring medicine. It looked really pathetic that Drew was unaccompanied while his three roommates had all their kids and grandkids doing the nurses' aid job. Drew could purchase meals, but one day he was on an IV from 11am to 4pm and missed lunch! Nobody was there to help him. Besides he couldn't really eat the generic lunches because his throat was so swollen. He needed my soup!

Drew was gone for four days. Back at the ranch (apartment) I was scrambling to take care of the kids and home. But SO MANY people helped! These are just a few, there were others too.

"We noticed that Drew hasn't been in class for three weeks..."

Ani Minnesotan, she's got that famous midwest work ethic.

Non-Minnesotans slept on the job. So cute.

Sophomores, seniors, babies, legos, harmonica.

This little tough-time has helped us empathize with others' sufferings:

• people who can't get efficient medical care
• families who are separated when a loved one is hospitalized
• single parents
• the sick

If you're one of these people, you're our hero. You're amazing.

Now, we pray that Drew will be well soon. A nice doc in the States has given Drew a good prescription, and we bought the drugs here. If you are a person who prays, we'd sure appreciate your help in that way. 


mononucleosis:
单核细胞增多症
dān hé xì bāo zēng duō zhèng

Bravery

Hello everyone, it's Jonathon! I'm two years and seven months old, and I CAN WALK!

 

Actually, I was capable of walking two months ago, but it was too terrifying. Daddy & Mommy tried to encourage me and allow me to realize my capability, but it made me sob. I've been through extreme pain and many scary situations so I'm very cautious. Also, it seems that my brain injury and disproportional body have affected my center of balance.


But I am becoming more brave every day. I've decided that I can dart from the coffee table to the chair, or wobble across the room! My family is cheering!


I'm even fearless enough to put some finger foods in my mouth. As soon as I figure out how to do the thumb-forefinger pincer, I'm gonna be a pro. And...I have to figure out how to chew and swallow. Then! Goodbye baby bottle.

I also wanted to tell you about another brave little boy named Finlay. Since I was courageous enough to leave the Butterfly Home Hospice and come live with my new family, my old crib opened up for another suffering child to be transferred from the Chinese state orphanage. They said he had an inoperable heart defect. But the Butterfly Home is very resourceful, and they arranged for Finlay to have two heart surgeries in Shanghai, nanny at his side. He'll be back at the Butterfly Home soon, now with a chance at life.
Here's brave buddy Finlay after surgery


And fun links about me:
My introduction
Me & my spunky brothers
I'm famous! I was featured in a hospital's newsletter
An explanation of my previous condition


with love,
Jonathon




brave:
勇敢的
yǒnggǎn de

It's 扁桃腺炎 and 病毒

First, thank you everyone for your concern for Drew. He's tired and sleeping like all day but probably on the way to recovery.

Yesterday he went to a nearby hospital. The doctor wanted him to be hospitalized for treatment. Since it seemed serious Drew went to a superior hospital for a second opinion. This doc also wanted Drew to be hospitalized but was willing to treat him as an outpatient, given the circumstances. 

Here's the results and the diagnosis:

 

Oh you can't read that? :)

Neither can we! :)

Drew has tonsillitis and a viral infection. He's taking lots of antibiotics and sleeping round the clock. He's eating better but still a bit febrile, has the chills and is completely exhausted.

And he's adorable even when sick.

Cultural Insights on Treating Illness

"Why did both doctors recommend for Drew to be hospitalized?"

I think it's because most Chinese prefer to receive their antibiotics intravenously, which requires the patient to remain at the hospital or repeatedly return for a series of injections. This, plus the fact that Drew's quite ill and needs good monitoring, is probably why the doctors thought he should stay.

But they let him go because Drew opted for pills rather than the iv. Moreover, there was nobody to care for him if he stayed. When someone is hospitalized the family of that patient takes the role of the nurse/nurse's assistant, preparing meals and doing basic care like hygiene and using the toilet. Obviously that arrangement was not gonna work for us.

Encouragers

Yesterday evening two dear ladies visited briefly, bringing Chinese medicine, fruit, lots of advice, concern and fried donut-like bread. Wow, that just made my day! Such kindness!

This afternoon we had a surprise visit from Drew's old buddy. He lives far away now but was in town for a couple hours on business. Drew managed to crawl out of bed for almost an hour. So great to see one of our favorite guys (the one in the middle holding Titus).

Don't worry, I'm sure he'll be fine soon! We're all ok.

tonsillitis:

扁桃腺炎biǎn táo xiàn yán

virus:

病毒

bìng dú

The Party That Nearly Killed Us

Two Thursdays ago we invited Drew's class over for an American meal. So that's 25 guests. Here we go: Rachel + 3 small children + backpack + all the food + toaster oven + two gas burners. Can she pull it off? 

Apparently yes, but it took four days of prep work and four days of cleaning.

And sadly, Drew became very, very ill the day after.

Le Menu:

BBQ baked chicken legs & wings

mashed potatoes with gravy

fresh steamed seasoned mixed vegetables

fresh fruit salad

pumpkin raisin muffins

apple crisp with ice cream

 

There are two other Americans in Drew's class. One guy pitched in by bartending on our back porch, which is the laundry drying room. Everybody loved it!

And here I digress. It's nice enjoying the companionship of peers. 

The statistics prof came -- he's the fellow looking at the camera.

Most of the guests left pretty early, like 8:30pm. But then we sat around talking with the bartender and the other American guy. They left. An enormous mess stayed. Our house was pretty trashed, but Drew and I needed to get to bed so we let the mess alone. The next morning Drew woke up vomiting. This is when the cook (me) starts panicking that maybe she food poisoned the entire class and the professor and their kids? Everyone is going to be texting each other:

you get sick too?  

must have been the chicken wings 

yeah, drew's wife poisoned us 

dear students, class is cancelled because everyone is seriously ill 

i hate american food

Thankfully, Drew was the only one who got sick. But poor Drew! He doesn't have food poisoning but rather some kind of vicious flu that swiped all his energy, gave him cold sweats, a fever, swollen eyes, crazy dreams, loss of appetite, general inability to function whatsoever for about three days. He's still not entirely recovered more than a week later.

With our efficient cleaning man out of commission, the task 'restore home to livable state' was placed squarely on my shoulders. I didn't get through the mountain of dishes until three days later! Maybe we'll do paper ware next time.

We're concerned about Drew, now twelve days later and still very fatigued. He's discouraged about getting behind on class work and living all messed up and groggy. 

This afternoon he went into the clinic; bloodwork revealed an abnormality related to 淋巴细胞 -- something about lymphocytes, says the dictionary. We don't really understand obscure medical terms in Chinese. But we do know that the physician recommended for him to be admitted to the hospital, so he's now alone on his way to a superior medical center to understand the problem and be treated. 

sick:

生病

shēng bìng

I Have Trouble I Wish Wasn't There

As we've all come to learn, turns out that life just can't get perfect. Somehow, trouble has been piling up, mostly relational trouble -- friends and loved ones with burdens, problems, sufferings, conflicts. I can't seem to relieve the burdens, fix the problems, heal the sufferings, resolve the conflicts. So I'm singing this song. It's kinda like my anthem right now.

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn't there

and I have asked a thousand ways

that you would take my pain away

One day you will set all things right

to sing a song:
唱歌
chàng gē


p.s.

her name is JJ Heller.

yes she is pregnant in the vid.

yes the guitar man is her hubs.

Meredith told me about her music.

Quadruple Scoop

Good morning everyone!

You may have guessed that our vpn has been defunct, so no blogging for me. No worries. 

Here's the truth: it's hard to handle three boys ages 3 & under. There's a lot of whining, diapering, disciplining, feeding, washing, comforting, repairing (what they break), cleaning (enormous messes).  

It's tiring pushing the double stroller to the market, hauling all the groceries home in a backpack, and carrying the little guys and all the groceries upstairs to our 6th floor flat, then towing everyone back out to pick up Titus from school... I could go on, right, but we all know being a parent is tiring and busy! And there's no good in complaining.

However, I do not consider my life to be rough. It's challenging --for me-- only because I'm rather weak and haven't been forced to handle much difficulty in my life. A mom struggling to make ends meet, feed her babies, survive, no husband...she's got it rough. With this perspective, I remember to be exceedingly grateful. I still feel some things are difficult, but again, I know it's cuz I'm wimpy. I have it easy. I am blessed. 

What's more, I get a lot of help and encouragement from my family. Drew works his tail off at home -- at soon as he sets foot in the door he's changing diapers, sweeping, doing laundry, washing dishes, giving the kids a bath. He doesn't stop. My extended family members are always cheering for me. And then there's my big boy Titus, who rewards mom with the kindest encouragements. I got a quadruple scoop of encouragement the other day, which is the point of this whole post and what I most wanted to share with you.

On the bus, out of the blue

T: I love you Mommy. And Daddy love you too. And Jonathon and Mai-mai love you.

Walking up the stairs to home

me: I’m bleeding; I’m gonna go up and get a band-aid.

T: You need someone to go with you. I’m gonna go with you. I will help you be brave. And God’s gonna help you be brave. You gotta put the sticker on then take the paper off.  Be brave Mommy.

Tucking into bed

T: Thank you Mommy!

me: For what?

T: Getting my bed ready.

T: Mommy you did a lot of cooking. You should sleep a lot.

to encourage:
鼓励
gǔ lì

How We Came Together

Yes! The vpn is working!!!
K, see here in Chiner sites like blogspot and facebook are blocked, so we use this little thing called a vpn to get around it...but for the past several days it's not been working. I had this post basically ready to go, just waiting for access....

Anyway, here's the tale of how Jonny boy became a part of our family. There's a little background-n-extra info, presented in timeline format for all you linear thinkers. Somehow it took me a long time to put all these pictures+text together, so I'm really hoping you dig it.

November 2001

Rachel Smith falls for Drew Addington.

September 29, 2007

Drew Addington marries Rachel Smith!

September 14, 2008

Titus is born.

February 2009
Drew, Titus and I move from Minnesota to Changsha.
Jonathon's mother is six months pregnant with him.


May 6, 2009
Jonathon is born in Changsha.
(So Titus & Jon are 8 months apart.)

September 2009
We relocate to East Changsha, one mile from the state welfare center.

Two of five buildings in the complex; one is 20 stories high

December 2009

Titus and I begin helping with abandoned disabled kids at the welfare center.








April 30th, 2010
Jonathon is abandoned and admitted to the welfare center orphanage.
One week later...

May 6th, 2010
Jonathon turns one year old.

July 18, 2010

Michael is born.



September 2010
We make more friends and connections within restricted parts of the welfare center, and see hundreds of orphans; we're compelled consider adoption and turn our attention towards the most disadvantaged people in this community.

January 17th, 2011
Jonathon is transfered to the Butterfly Home for hospice care. The welfare center says he has an untreatable brain tumor and will die soon.

He is one and a half years-old and weighs 17 lbs. He has an enlarged head, frail body, loss of appetite, and is increasingly miserable. He often vomits, has a fever and requires a feeding tube.





January & February 2011
Further tests determine that Jon doesn't have a brain tumor. He has an infection in the tissues of his skull and a cyst consuming the left side of his cranium.

Jonathon claps, occasionally smiles at his nannies, cuddles, and sleeps well, but he has trouble with diarrhea and uncoordinated eyes.


March 16th, 2011
Jonathon is accompanied by a Butterfly Home nanny to Suzhou, China for surgery to drain the pus and open his skull to scrape out infected tissue. The surgery is performed by a Western physician who travels to do procedures for kids like Jon.

April 2011
Jonathon can roll over and hold his head up. He smiles at his nannies.


May 6, 2011
Jonathon turns 2 years-old. He weighs 19 lbs. He can sit up and is developing and healing very fast.

May 2011

I visit The Butterfly Home. The image of a little boy, with an enormous head and tiny body, lying listless on his back, sticks in my heart. (It was Jon; I didn't know his name yet.)


Foster care became a consideration for the first time. But with no place to live or definite plans past July, we have to see if we're in position to do so.

July 2011
My parents (Mike & Jen) visit us for five weeks; they help at the Butterfly Home twice per week and meet all the babies, including Jonathon. 


We find an apartment and move to West Changsha, a 40 minute trip from the Butterfly Home.

August 2011

Drew's parents, Jon & Louise, and sister Jen visit us for two weeks, and see the Butterfly Home and Jonathon.

Drew is awarded a full tuition-free scholarship with a small stipend, which means we have a certain future plan -- we can consider fostering.

We have dinner with the Butterfly House folks -- Alan & Lyn -- to discuss fostering. Jonathon is suggested as a good candidate, out of the current 13 Butterfly House children.

We decide yes, we want to do it. And we agree, Jonathon feels like the one.

Jon & Louise snapped this picture.

September 2011

Jonathon is 2 years and 4 months old. He weighs 22 lbs, and eats Pediasure formula through a bottle. His body proportions are improving and he's gaining strength. He's very active, can pull himself up and even walk if holding someone's hand. He's jovial and social but a little timid. He babbles, says a few words, and waves 'bye-bye'.

I visit Jonathon 2-3 times every week, learning from his nannies how to care for him, and building familiarity and trust. Drew visits him once per week.
We complete paperwork and a home study visit. Jon visits our house.

September 29, 2011
It's our 4th wedding anniversary. Titus just turned 3; Michael is 14 months.
Jonathon is 2 years and 5 months; he becomes a part of our family!

getting ready to go

I realize this blog has been a little concentrated on the Jon-related content recently, and I promise to write about other things...haha, it's just that, he's a big deal! He's completely impacted our lives, and this blog is just about...our lives, our little story.

I gotta run, but here's a Chinese word---

brain:
脑子
nǎozi


By the way, the word computer is literally 'electric brain', cool huh?
电脑
diànnǎo