Best Place for Family Dining (Amended)

And here we are having Saturday family supper inside a house of prostitution.

This honor has been given to us a few times now. Doesn't that make you smile, even chuckle a little bit, for joy? The crazy wonderful arrangements of our Redeemer? Haha. How did we arrive here, in Changsha, befriended by those in the photo, invited to dinner inside their shop? A prostitute (I'm disinclined to label her that way, that is not who she really is, she is...image-bearer, daughter, sister, mother, friend, survivor, heroine), she tenderly chop-stick fed Titus his entire supper. A great honor. This is beyond me. This is Jesus. It's a real joy to be caught up in his movement.

This weekend held many other surprises. At the moment I can't write it all out for you (must. hang. laundry. while the sun is still out! better. do. dishes. before Drew gets home!), but I will tell you, right...

...

Oh hey, it's been a week.

That day, that whole weekend there were lotsa of great little things that happened. In particular, Saturday morning was a concentration of surprises.

They're on the next post, Feburary 2nd, 2013! GO THERE!

counting the graces

thank you Father for

four gathered in Js' name

revitalizing warmth on the sunporch

hardly any need for a coat today

Titus & Mike's preschooler conversations, building on each others' creative play ideas

Jon's thick raven-black hair

Irreversible Mush

(appears those two dudes are holding hands but they most definitely are not)

I'm always raving about Butterfly Home. Here we go again.

Since mid-October our visits have been infrequent, once or twice per month as there is a special project or immunizations for Jonathon. Every time we go there are new kiddos to behold -- what's his name, his story, his temperament? Of course the impossibly-tiny premies are perfectly adorable. The older kids, like a four year-old boy who arrived recently, just the same move beholders to awestruck wonder. A youngster of immeasurable worth, once with little hope, now finds such favor in a nurturing home with devoted caregivers. The heart melts to irreversible liquid-mush state.

Every time we step foot in the door there are new renovations and decorations. It's like there's a line between the eyes and the jaw. Eyes see, jaw drops. The place looks better and better -- expanded into another living area, this room organized, a new play room.

Yep, a new play room! Drew, Uncle Li and a couple guy friends helped out with the wall padding, a small part of the whole project. Before.

After. 

I highly recommend following the Butterfly blog!

counting the graces

thank you Father for

kind and honest email from sister

seats for everyone on the uncrowded bus

plopped on couches with familiar moms, sharing experiences, laughing easy, prayer

music is just so fun

hide and seek tag in a big field with trees and rocks, late afternoon sun

warmth of Lyn & Alan; they know just how to encourage a soul

big table of men discussing good news

surprise visit and cakes from that beloved friend and her grandson, impeccable timing

now a hand towel in the bathroom

listerine breath smooches from husband 

Genesis and Our Colorful Cozy Dinky Tower Dwelling

Drew and Matt, our bearded men there, have been facilitating this group studying Genesis every weekend. We all had lunch at our place on Saturday. The personalities in this cohesive group are eclectic, ranging from housewife beauty to obsessive compulsive socially-misfit guy to doctor dad to cute newlywed couple. The discussion is earnest, thoughtful, steady. Drew and Matt like teaching Genesis together, especially the the first few chapters which are foundational for understanding the world and the human heart and all relationships, this isn't how it was supposed to be...

Side note. When we have groups like this, just ten or fifteen people, our apartment starts to feel cramped. Maximum capacity in the kitchen is three bodies. In the dining area, some stood to eat because we don't have enough chairs! Ha. Well. Good thing Chinese prefer a gathering that's lively and bursting (热闹). Maybe someday we'll move into a space with more potential to host a crowd. We're too small to host our Family meetings or moms' & kids' playgroup. Plus, some people are kinda turned off by the hike up stairs to the sixth floor. For now though, our colorful cozy dinky tower dwelling is just fine. Drew and I love our home. (I think it's 950 sq. ft. including the 3-season porch.)

counting the graces

thank you Father for

the consistency and comfort of steady grey city traffic

抹茶 mattya tea 

Led Zeppelin

Ps 25 "teach me to know your ways"

Jonathon bubbly little boy

brother safely returned from winter camping

happy little family enjoying chocolate pudding together, last day of school treat

folding laundry

unchanging you
montage of personalities

Jonathon's Adoption Status

 Our 14 year-old sister Jennifer skillfully painted this for me as a Christmas gift.
Needless to say, I was blown away.

Jonathon, what do you think of your masterpiece portrait?

Late in 2012 Jonathon was finally listed with an international adoption organization, meaning that families could view his profile and pursue him for adoption. In accordance with laws in place to protect children, we are not closely informed of interest or developments and that's fine. When we need to know something it will be related at the appropriate time.

Parents in the international adoption community are quite resourceful, and I know that some interested in China adoption and perhaps Jonathon specifically have been watching our blog. For that demographic, Drew and I want to be absolutely clear that our intent and original expectation was to foster Jonathon until he is adopted by another family. At present we are unable to adopt him because we do not meet several requirements, and we can't know with certainty that we will meet all those requirements in the future. Besides this, we long for Jonathon to live in a place where he can reach his potential with special education, speech therapy, and career opportunities in the future. He will benefit greatly from living in a country that has these programs and professionals to enrich his life. We long to see Jonathon permanently settled into a loving family. He will thrive. I can already imagine his smug little grin when he knows, "these are the ones who came for me, adore me, keep me forever."

We have viewed Jonathon's basic listing on the adoption organization's blog, which advocates for waiting children. It's really bizarre to see his face, which we photographed, and his description, which we wrote, listed on that website. It's happening, I thought, with tears. Soon. He's going to be pursued, matched, and then, leave for his permanent family. We will grieve and we will miss him, but we will also celebrate and wonder at what lies ahead for Jonathon. We will be thankful that for this season, he didn't have to live in an institution or group home; he snuggled right into our family where he was uniquely loved, challenged, understood, stimulated, well-prepared for the next big step!

counting the graces

thank you Father for

you want contrition not perfection

real good and meaningful phone chat connection with my aunt

friends, including a newly engaged couple, and pizza

Drew cleaned the bathroom 

lying on a totally relaxed back in a deep and restful sleep

you seem so tangible today

your astounding answer to my prayer, offered with little hope four years ago

Love Is Real Yo

Take a look at this little well-loved little bub. 

When his Daddy and Mommy got pregnant, they were young, unmarried, not sure if they wanted to be together in the future. His Mommy was 19, from a lower middle class rural family. Daddy was 24, sweet heart but a little naive and dependent, from a lower upper class urban family. In any normal situation like this, an abortion would be the natural next step. 

In urban Chinese culture pregnancies outside of marriage are a usual occurrence, but culturally there is a strong taboo and associated shame. There is no place, socially, for an unmarried mother or a child born outside of marriage. Government assistance and NGOs do not exist for these women and children. Abortion is commonplace, acceptable, natural. 

So when this little guy's Mom became pregnant, she and her boyfriend approached his rich parents for abortion money. Normally, prompt consent would result, but this family's got something special: The boyfriend's mother has been an enthusiastic follower of Love since the 90s. She's been a good friend and encourager to us especially in the past two years. This mother/grandmother convinced the young couple to keep the baby, bringing the mother into her home and providing for their needs, and with sincere kindness, acceptance and support.

I am so impressed. This is such a wonderful anomaly, demonstrative of Love's power to change everything, save lives, preserve families, redeem those times when we miss the mark.

The Daddy and Mommy just applied for their marriage license.

What plans are stored up for you, little buddy boy? 

p.s. took this picture right after chowing down on semi-raw goose liver sandwiches at their house. mmm! mmm!

counting the graces, by Drew

thank you Father for

leaving for fellowship on time

coffee and nice blue mug

playing lion with Mai-Mai

Mai-Mai drawing out all his vowels really long

deep fog

cute wife

tiniest store you've ever seen did have wet wipes

note from my brother Peter

large bowl of fresh green beans

Ice 冰

In winter people flock to coffeeshops and supermarkets and malls to stay warm; their homes are cold or they figure, the heat is free in public areas. This day we had the same idea; got our hot chocolate but the coffeeshop was packed, no seats (aforementioned reason) so we joined another crowd in a strip mall and I did my Chinese homework at the electronics counter, very normal.

There's a joke that circulates every winter.

Somebody from Hunan says, "It's so cold, 30 degrees!"
Then somebody from Beijing [north] says, "Here it's 0!"
And a Harbiner [far north] pipes up, "Yah, well up here it's 10 below."

Then the one from Hunan speaks again, "30 degrees is our inside temperature."


Hunan winter. Anyone who has endured it agrees that its an unfavorable season, uncomfortably cold inside the house and dismal gray outside. But it's short enough; January and February are the two months to beat. I haven't the heart to enumerate the difficulties of winter here and I'd rather not dwell on it. I'm just sayin, it can be a melancholic, tiresome season. But things are lookin up.

counting the graces

thank you Father for

date with a close, comfortable friend

Drew got his phone working how he wanted it to

far view from mountain side, reminds me to keep my vision broad 

caring aunt sent a sweet note and hand-embroidered dish towel

Jon says, "oops!"

Mike says, "big kiss!"

Mike pointing to pictures teaching Jon the words

Titus reciting songs from school, correcting me

all our needs provided this past year, abundantly

enthusiastic help and encouragement from a friend

husband who never holds a grudge and is always quick to reconcile

we are warm, fed, clothed, clean, together, and we have Treasure

peace at the day's close

Weird Stuff We Eat

Over here we've been running an experiment since summertime. See if you can guess what it is.

black rice and small white beans, purple potatoes, tiny Chinese cabbage with garlic

spinach, romaine, arugula leaves, big bean sprout, tomato, red cabbage, carrots, garbanzo beans

barley and big white beans, sweet potatoes, green beans

romaine leaves, tomato, cilantro, corn, black beans

brown rice and black beans, green beans, carrots, leeks

broccoli, tofu, penne in pesto

curry: peas, carrots, red pepper, tiny Chinese cabbage, small white beans and red rice

white beans, barley, sweet potato and spinach with garlic

black rice and tofu, broccoli, snow peas, carrots, red pepper, zucchini

a couple kinds of beans, penne, spinach, tomato, leek, basil

taro soup, white rice, soy beans and bamboo shoots, Chinese leafy green

white rice, smoked tofu, broccoli, hot pepper

1. Chinese leafy green  2. smoked tofu with bean sprouts and hot pepper
3. barley porridge  4. broad beans with small white beans

tofu, green beans, peas, carrots, corn, tomato, basil

Well, any idea?

For the sake of efficiency, nutrition and frugality, we've been getting our protein from beans and tofu, rarely eating meat at home. It happened gradually, somewhat unintentionally, the outcome of a few principles:

1. Can I buy it within walking distance, and cheap? 
2. Is it nutritious?
3. Can I prep and cook in less than 30 minutes? 

Actually another factor was, in summer we'd go to market in the morning and want to stay outside to play rather than take our hunk of pork directly home to the fridge. I stopped buying meat and then we were free to roam for hours.

Now for some blips about meals at our home. I recommend The Tofu Secret.

I never plan meals. 
Each week I get groceries twice at an open air market and load our fridge and cabinets with vegetables, fruit, grains, beans, tofu. Supper time rolls around, I open the fridge match some things together for a meal.

Made possible by...

I'm blessed because my husband is easy to please and grateful for whatever I place before him, my kids love vegetables, we can buy fresh produce every day.

Bean-Related
We have a grain store nearby that sells about ten varieties of dried beans out of bins. A slow-cooker makes rehydration so easy. Bean-eaters can experience issues with gas. Drew does. It's not so bad though.

The Tofu Secret
We're lucky to have a dozen varieties of tofu available. But we mostly just stick to two kinds, frozen tofu and smoked tofu. Have you tried to cook with tofu before but found it too squishy, breakable in the pan? This is the secret: put it in the freezer it for about 24 hrs, thaw and cut as desired. You'll find that it's now a strong, cohesive yet soft texture, and can withstand your stir-frying. It's the perfect substitute for cubed chicken breast.

My goodness, all this healthy eating!

Well, we also consume our fair share of hot dogs, french fries, cookies, chocolate donuts, etcetera.

counting the graces

thank you Father for

snowfall recalling a hundred winter childhood memories

hard rock music written for the Lion; I feel His ferocity and potency

meeting neighbor's new baby

crunchy snow, snowballs, kids eating snow, slip-sliding on ice

winter discomfort and inconvenience, chances to learn joy when I dislike my situation

electricity

soft little toddler face snuggled against mine