Mold,
This is a Notice of Eviction.
In this humidity, I could understand when you began to creep up the corners of the walls and covered the sink caulk like black paint. You made our closets your home -- on leather belts, shirts and pants. You inhabited the kitchen -- dusting yourself over burners, pots and pans. I see that you had no problem making yourself comfortable on window screens and even glass window panes.
But now you've had the audacity to slather your filth over my baby's clothes. You have become a most unwanted guest, and I consider you the vilest of enemies. Although you may have won the battle for the baby clothes, you haven't won the war. Bleach is on the way.
Cockroaches,
This is a Notice of Eviction.
Maybe you couldn't help yourself when we left out a few dirty dishes overnight. You climbed up the pipes, to the fourth floor, and entered our home through the sink drain. Taking up permanent residence in our water dispenser, you raided our kitchen by night. Then we used our own Raid on your clan. After it became clear that the water dispenser was an impenetrable fortress, we removed your little stronghold and got a new water dispenser.
Now I see that you've sent an expedition to chart new territory in our bathroom, climbing the shower curtain while I'm shampooing my hair. Get out of my apartment! Ahhhhhh!
your truest foe,
Rachel
ewwwwwwwwwwww
ReplyDeleteoh my!! i hope they/it heeds your eviction!!
ReplyDeleteWow, we can completely understand with that. I remember coming back from the summer and having to deal with those nasty, nasty creatures. I was pleasantly surprised at how effective the black coiled stuff is that you light and it fills the room with smoke. (With two little ones it makes it hard though.) We had company over, and I would put it in the kitchen and walk in every couple of minutes to kill a couple in a frenzy. I detest those creatures. Never had to really deal with them before then, so I get so grossed out by them. Hope it gets better! Congrats btw on the baby boy! Lisa and I never got to congratulate you two on that! Miss you all!
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