Thinking about Adoption

I have been dreaming about adopting children for...15 years? When I was a kid I asked my parents to bring another sibling into our family. Now I envision bringing children into my & Drew's family.

Why? Compassion for orphans. Compulsion to obey the Word. Giving Life where the thief had come to steal, kill and destroy.

And because we've personally experienced the miracle of being adopted into Abba's Family.



I was captivated by this PBS documentary following the adoption of eight year-old Sui Yong of Guangzhou, China, into the Sardowsky family of Long Island, New York. Yes, I was especially interested because the Sardowskys are similar to what I imagine the Addingtons becoming: Two biological older sons, and two younger Chinese daughters.

Drew & I have no idea what good plans Abba has for us. Definitely have no clue how we could afford it. And consider the potential for an identity crisis: "I'm ethnically Chinese, born in China, abandoned at age two, adopted by foreigners living in China, raised in China but in an American home, my first language was Chinese but now it's English, I have American citizenship but I've only visited America...I can't tell you if I'm American, Chinese, both or neither..."



Anyway, if you're curious about adopting from China, this one-hour documentary is fascinating. (Especially recommending it to Wai-gong and Wai-po.)

Notes: From the perspective of a Cross-cultural Studies major / Chinese-culture sympathizer, there are some cultural oversights which annoyed me.

1. Sui Yong is eight years old and speaks no English. Her new mother knows like two Chinese words (and pronounces them incorrectly by the way). How would you feel if you're eight, and your new, strange-looking mother shows up and she can't speak your language? And she's taking you to her country where they also don't speak your language? Terrifying! Why didn't the family make an effort to learn more Chinese, and meet Sui Yong part way? My Guess: Ugly Americans...think everyone should learn English. I understand that Sui Yong needed to learn English fast, and they didn't want to give her any crutches. But they could have eased the transition by at least learning "I love you" "Hungry?" "Thirsty?" "Toilet?"

2. It seems that Sui Yong's new mother has no understanding of a major characteristic of Chinese culture: a strong in-group vs. out-group mentality. Case in point: At the hotel, Mom can't understand "I'm an American, and you're Chinese -- Why does this matter?" If only Mom knew, for Chinese, there are two kinds of people in this world: WE Chinese and THOSE waiguoren, literally, outside-country people. Sui Yong probably thinks she might as well be adopted by a pack of wolves. Her mother is an alien, an outsider; they share nothing.


Watch the video.
http://www.pbs.org/pov/woainimommy/watch.php

Facts about adoption.
http://www.pbs.org/pov/woainimommy/adoption_fact_sheet.php



Also welcoming your reactions to this post in the 'reader responses' section.

- Rachel